Wednesday, 9 February 2011
Let me give you another example. I will set the scene for you. I have been a very heavy drinker in the past, I realise that I have used alcohol to self medicate a lot of my problems and issues, I now take medication that means I should not drink under any circumstances, combined with the medication, nowadays I have a nasty reaction when drinking and I become angry and aggressive. So, I may be going out to a place where alcohol is served, I am determined not to drink, I have got passed The Committees first session and get to the place I am going, they re-seat for the second session. 'Get a drink, go on get one, why not, who will it hurt, get one, you deserve it, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, go on get one, just have one, see how you feel after one, you should stop taking those meds and just get back to being you again, go on get yourself one' next thing I know I am blind drunk.
Yes, The Committee have caused me untold trauma and stress, its hard to know when I am doing the right thing or not some days as my thoughts can be so overwhelming and draining.
Hence, my exhaustion.